Hope this post finds you in a good place and in good spirits today. It was such a nice weekend this past Saturday and Sunday - much needed time to get away and just sit and be still. Sunny and warm weather does a heart good sometimes. I am reflecting on the stars Saturday night as Carol and I took the dogs for a walk in the late evening. Its always a special time for me as I look up into the heavens and see so many stars, with so many questions, so much longing for a talk with my mom and imagining what she is experiencing and seeing right in those moments. In my heart I know my mom is with me but to be honest here, I do miss that relationship of having a mom. I think about some of the people in my life who although young, they too are missing out on that mom relationship. Maybe that is why for some, I step up in big ways in my role as a dad or step dad. I know there are relationships all around me that need that outside voice.
Last night during Rock Group - the conversation was just awesome after a great lesson on being that outside voice into the people around you. Our kids need their parents but also a voice to speak into their lives. So often we dont have that because of being afraid and really not knowing what to do or to say when a teenager comes to you in tears or having an issue they need guidance on. Often times just being there is all you need to do.
Presence - is powerful!
Yesterday when I got home from the cabin I got to take one of my daughters :) - out for a coffee. We talked and shared some things and yesterday at this point in time, I dont have the answers, I want to take away the hurt, I want to have something to pull from the Bible ... but I didnt have any of it. All I had was me. Turned out, that is all she needed. After coffee we went and picked up a pizza and while waiting we headed over to Harris Teeter to pick up a few things for her breakfast this week before school. She wants to make a cake, her first one so we got those things to make one. Promising that I would get a piece - its during those times, nothing fancy, nothing really fun but radio off, cells off, connection is made and its so cool to be there in those times when a teenager just needs some guidance. Sometimes they dont need a sermon to listen to or someone telling them what to do - its just about relationship.
Youth ministry is all about that relationship. I see it forming in our rock group with the new families that are with us. I see the importance of someone investing in my son Kyle other than me and who is speaking truth into their life. I dont care if its over coffee, going skiing or just talking and walking through Bass Pro Shops. Relationships....
I can remember back about a year ago and our youth pastor was in the middle of his sermon and a student stopped and raised her hand. With a greeting, she said - You dont even know my name! - and she was hurt. I stepped up and said her name and she smiled and asked her question. I had not had that right to speak into her life yet. I only knew her from afar and a few conversations. Because I knew her name and didnt leave her hanging in front of 50 other students, which probably would have meant her not ever coming back, she and I bonded and still today, though not as often as I would like - we catch up and we share what is happening in our lives. She asks about church and work and more importantly I get to ask about school, home and how her walk is with Christ. Sure not everyone can pour into these teenagers like that nor can you do that to everyone but relationships matter. They need to know that you care and love them - even when its awkward. Yes parents, there are awkward moments but press through them. How is your daughter going to know how to be treated by a guy she is dating if you dad, dont show her? How is your son going to know how to treat a girl he has the hots for if you dont show them with how you treat their mom?
Relationships - sometimes just taking a student, your daughter, your son, the person you have influence with, to Walmart .... radio off, cell off and just listen. Sure teenagers are drama filled, full of themselves at times, ramble on and talk and talk - but listening is what they need sometimes. You may not ever need the answers or even sometimes say a word. Your presence is all they may need and in a few years, those moments of you being there may have eternal benefits as well.
Having a presence in a students life, your son or daughters, is like Christ having a presence in your life. He is always there and its up to you to model that for them. They need to see you have a relationship with Christ so they have something to model in their own life.
Presence is showing others they matter and you are showing them by doing what you are saying. People often times dont want to hear what we have to say - they want you to show them what you have to say.
Tomorrow, I am headed to the middle school girls basketball game - there will be a lot of familiar faces for sure. I only know that because one of my students texted me last night to tell me she is starting on the team. I wouldn't miss this for anything because that relationship matters. I dont really care if they win or lose - I do care that she will know there is someone in the stands that cares and puts a priority on being there. Relationship. Along with doing this, I get to see others, cheerleaders that I know, other students, parents - its all about relationships.
Your relationship with Christ will spread into the relationships around you. If God is speaking truth into your heart - you will do the same into the people around you.
Its the heart of ministry. Your ministry, rock group ministry, student ministry - Christs ministry in your life.

Thank you Lord for being a presence in my life so that I may have a presence in someone Else's life. Help us just focus on you and be ok in those awkward moments when its silent and we dont know what to say. Help us just focus in ministry Lord because its about relationships. We thank you for your relationship with us and for making it that important to save us. Help us build relationships in our lives centered and focused on the things of you. Thank you for coffee and conversations Lord.... heaven will be full of both I'm sure. Amen