It has been awhile
since i have jotted down a note. I used to write every day when I had
my blog "The Walk" going and since Facebook is taking a turn to Twitter
it may be time to reactivate it again. I do miss writing and sharing my
thoughts as I am on the journey of this life.
I have been thinking a lot about my brother the last week or so since his passing. I was extended time to share in front of the Student Ministry last week at Harrisburg Presby where I have been volunteering my time on Wed night to pour into some students there. It has been such a blessing and an honor to be able to do that. It just makes my heart smile seeing a young person grab a hold of what God has for them and his purposes become theirs. There is nothing more exciting because then the world opens up to new light and new possibilities. I am very thankful for where God has me today and for the people he has put into my life and the things he is teaching me. Some lessons to learn are come with pain, hurt and tears but those are the lessons we learn deepest.
My brother Danny was 51 and suffered a heart attack. I was on the phone with my dad when the Dr came out to tell him he was sorry and that they tried everything they could but couldnt revive him. Danny had a heart attack 3 yrs before and I met with him at the hospital afterwards and had a really good talk. We talked about life, how hard it was and how bad he wanted to get his life right. Not only life right with everyone but also with God. It was a good faith and life conversation and one that I know the next day when he spoke with a few pastors that came to visit him, those seeds planted the day before help him in his decisions to accept Christ into his life. We have had these conversations a couple times and I know he never fully felt accepted or worthy enough of Gods love. He had these same issues with family. My brother was full of life. Though his life was filled with tough decisions and results that were not the most pleasant - I can say with all my heart he loved his family. Especially his children. I can honestly say that if you were considered to be on his inner circle - there wasnt anything my brother would not do for you. He would love you in the way he only knew but with everything he had. I think after a life time of struggling, 51 years he was tired. He knew God and heard of this final place where eternity would be spent and I think he was okay with that. As we all gathered for my brothers wake and funeral - so many poured into to pay their last respect and pass on their condolences. I got to meet a lot of my brothers friends, extended family on his moms side and people I knew when I was younger but had not seen in years. My brother lived life and he lived it wide open. I can remember him taking me down the 1/4 mile drag strip with me in the passenger seat and having his Chevy Nova floored and smoke pouring from the wheels. My head was stuck on the back of the seat unable to turn it in either direction. That is the way my brother lived and his friends loved him for that. So many cards came in the mail, phone calls, facebook messages, Twitter messages and text messages came in for a solid week. I had a buddy of mine from work and one of my mentor students that I have lunch with on Fridays, she and her mom came for the wake and as I walked out after the service, I stopped and saw them standing there and I couldnt help but to stop and hug them both as tears filled my eyes. It was a big sacrifice of their time and money to drive 100 miles each way to support my family and I. I dont have words to how much that meant to me.
As the service and pastors were speaking, all I could think about was a passage in John 11 where Jesus was traveling and had heard his dear friend Lasarus was sick and had died. He reminded everyone that his sickness would not end in his death. No, it was for Gods glory so that Gods Son may be glorified through it. He stayed 2 more days only miles away from them.
John 11:11 After he had said this, he went on to tell them, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I am going there to wake him up.”
12 His disciples replied, “Lord, if he sleeps, he will get better.” 13 Jesus had been speaking of his death, but his disciples thought he meant natural sleep.
14 So then he told them plainly, “Lazarus is dead, 15 and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.”
16 Then Thomas said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.”
Jesus Comforts the Sisters of Lazarus
17 On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. 18 Now Bethany was less than two miles[b] from Jerusalem, 19 and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother. 20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home.
21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”
23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”
24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”
25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”
27 “Yes, Lord,” she told him, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who was to come into the world.”
28 After she had said this, she went back and called her sister Mary aside. “The Teacher is here,” she said, “and is asking for you.” 29 When Mary heard this, she got up quickly and went to him. 30 Now Jesus had not yet entered the village, but was still at the place where Martha had met him. 31 When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there.
32 When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”
33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34 “Where have you laid him?” he asked.
“Come and see, Lord,” they replied.
35 Jesus wept.
36 Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”
37 But some of them said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?”
Jesus Raises Lazarus From the Dead
38 Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. 39 “Take away the stone,” he said.
“But, Lord,” said Martha, the sister of the dead man, “by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.”
40 Then Jesus said, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”
41 So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.”
43 When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” 44 The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.
Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”
I share this because over the past few weeks with my brothers passing, a lot is reflected. I love that even though the pain is real and I have not once questioned God in his bigger than my plan, I love that Scripture records for us verse 35. The shortest passage in the Bible - Jesus wept. Weeping is not a good cry or shedding a tear because you are upset but a full blown sobbing. Jesus saw the pain and anguish of the people there as well as Mary and Martha. He understood their pain and even though before he even left to go to Lazarus - he already knew he would be raising him - Jesus wept - anyways. He understands us. He feels us. He knows us. He gets us. He completes us.
Jesus knew he would be glorified that day - there is without a doubt 4 days and a smell from the tomb - He said "Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?" in verse 40. I fully believe my brother is with Jesus today. He is sitting at the throne of God in awe at what is taking place in heaven. He is with my mom and gosh he loved my mom so much. He loved talking with her and she got him through many trials over his life and today - they have all eternity to sit and talk. 51 years is too short but through death, God is glorified. It reminds us that life is short and how fragile it is. Having to live my life the older I get, I have buried my mom and a brother, both my in-laws and 2 grandparents. I am just thankful that God made a way for us. He doesnt see death the way we do. He sees it not as as end but a beginning. A beginning to eternity if you know him. I am so thankful that I do. Dont know how anyone goes through this life without Him.
Enjoy Heaven bro - miss you man. See you soon - just not too soon.
Gods comfort and peace,
Lonnie~
I have been thinking a lot about my brother the last week or so since his passing. I was extended time to share in front of the Student Ministry last week at Harrisburg Presby where I have been volunteering my time on Wed night to pour into some students there. It has been such a blessing and an honor to be able to do that. It just makes my heart smile seeing a young person grab a hold of what God has for them and his purposes become theirs. There is nothing more exciting because then the world opens up to new light and new possibilities. I am very thankful for where God has me today and for the people he has put into my life and the things he is teaching me. Some lessons to learn are come with pain, hurt and tears but those are the lessons we learn deepest.
My brother Danny was 51 and suffered a heart attack. I was on the phone with my dad when the Dr came out to tell him he was sorry and that they tried everything they could but couldnt revive him. Danny had a heart attack 3 yrs before and I met with him at the hospital afterwards and had a really good talk. We talked about life, how hard it was and how bad he wanted to get his life right. Not only life right with everyone but also with God. It was a good faith and life conversation and one that I know the next day when he spoke with a few pastors that came to visit him, those seeds planted the day before help him in his decisions to accept Christ into his life. We have had these conversations a couple times and I know he never fully felt accepted or worthy enough of Gods love. He had these same issues with family. My brother was full of life. Though his life was filled with tough decisions and results that were not the most pleasant - I can say with all my heart he loved his family. Especially his children. I can honestly say that if you were considered to be on his inner circle - there wasnt anything my brother would not do for you. He would love you in the way he only knew but with everything he had. I think after a life time of struggling, 51 years he was tired. He knew God and heard of this final place where eternity would be spent and I think he was okay with that. As we all gathered for my brothers wake and funeral - so many poured into to pay their last respect and pass on their condolences. I got to meet a lot of my brothers friends, extended family on his moms side and people I knew when I was younger but had not seen in years. My brother lived life and he lived it wide open. I can remember him taking me down the 1/4 mile drag strip with me in the passenger seat and having his Chevy Nova floored and smoke pouring from the wheels. My head was stuck on the back of the seat unable to turn it in either direction. That is the way my brother lived and his friends loved him for that. So many cards came in the mail, phone calls, facebook messages, Twitter messages and text messages came in for a solid week. I had a buddy of mine from work and one of my mentor students that I have lunch with on Fridays, she and her mom came for the wake and as I walked out after the service, I stopped and saw them standing there and I couldnt help but to stop and hug them both as tears filled my eyes. It was a big sacrifice of their time and money to drive 100 miles each way to support my family and I. I dont have words to how much that meant to me.
As the service and pastors were speaking, all I could think about was a passage in John 11 where Jesus was traveling and had heard his dear friend Lasarus was sick and had died. He reminded everyone that his sickness would not end in his death. No, it was for Gods glory so that Gods Son may be glorified through it. He stayed 2 more days only miles away from them.
John 11:11 After he had said this, he went on to tell them, “Our friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I am going there to wake him up.”
12 His disciples replied, “Lord, if he sleeps, he will get better.” 13 Jesus had been speaking of his death, but his disciples thought he meant natural sleep.
14 So then he told them plainly, “Lazarus is dead, 15 and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.”
16 Then Thomas said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.”
Jesus Comforts the Sisters of Lazarus
17 On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. 18 Now Bethany was less than two miles[b] from Jerusalem, 19 and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother. 20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home.
21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”
23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”
24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”
25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”
27 “Yes, Lord,” she told him, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who was to come into the world.”
28 After she had said this, she went back and called her sister Mary aside. “The Teacher is here,” she said, “and is asking for you.” 29 When Mary heard this, she got up quickly and went to him. 30 Now Jesus had not yet entered the village, but was still at the place where Martha had met him. 31 When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there.
32 When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”
33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34 “Where have you laid him?” he asked.
“Come and see, Lord,” they replied.
35 Jesus wept.
36 Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”
37 But some of them said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?”
Jesus Raises Lazarus From the Dead
38 Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance. 39 “Take away the stone,” he said.
“But, Lord,” said Martha, the sister of the dead man, “by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.”
40 Then Jesus said, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”
41 So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.”
43 When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!” 44 The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.
Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”
I share this because over the past few weeks with my brothers passing, a lot is reflected. I love that even though the pain is real and I have not once questioned God in his bigger than my plan, I love that Scripture records for us verse 35. The shortest passage in the Bible - Jesus wept. Weeping is not a good cry or shedding a tear because you are upset but a full blown sobbing. Jesus saw the pain and anguish of the people there as well as Mary and Martha. He understood their pain and even though before he even left to go to Lazarus - he already knew he would be raising him - Jesus wept - anyways. He understands us. He feels us. He knows us. He gets us. He completes us.
Jesus knew he would be glorified that day - there is without a doubt 4 days and a smell from the tomb - He said "Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?" in verse 40. I fully believe my brother is with Jesus today. He is sitting at the throne of God in awe at what is taking place in heaven. He is with my mom and gosh he loved my mom so much. He loved talking with her and she got him through many trials over his life and today - they have all eternity to sit and talk. 51 years is too short but through death, God is glorified. It reminds us that life is short and how fragile it is. Having to live my life the older I get, I have buried my mom and a brother, both my in-laws and 2 grandparents. I am just thankful that God made a way for us. He doesnt see death the way we do. He sees it not as as end but a beginning. A beginning to eternity if you know him. I am so thankful that I do. Dont know how anyone goes through this life without Him.
Enjoy Heaven bro - miss you man. See you soon - just not too soon.
Gods comfort and peace,
Lonnie~
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