Doubting Suntan

Tuesday morning. Good morning! As I stated on my Facebook status this morning - the sun may not be shining today but it sure is a bright morning! So thankful for that... my heart is back where it needs to be, wants to be and loves to be.
The last few days for me personally were some of the toughest days I have ever experienced. I wont go into details but I am just so thankful to be past them and moving forward. I had a conversation a few days ago with one of my close students and she was explaining to me how God was such a big part of her life a year ago, God was doing some amazing things in her life and somehow over the last year she has slipt back to that person she was before. My wisdom that I shared with her was to not look back. Start today, this morning, fresh and put it all into God hands. Make the beginning right now and thats the wisdom that I need to take as well. I doubted a few very close people in my life whom I love with all my heart and I should have never of doubted what I knew so deeply in my heart to be true. I wont let that happen again !!!!
Doubting is one of those spiritual barriers that keep us moving closing to God. When we doubt God will show up in a big way or answer a prayer we have ... we basically tie his hands because of our lack of faith. My faith and trust has grown because of the paths the last few days and I am thankful for that..... with all the tears in me...I am thankful for that!
This past week I have spent a lot of time outside and yeah - maybe a little too much sun. A few years ago when I was sick - I lost my ability to stand bright light and so I never go outside without my sunglasses. So yes, I have the racoon marks on my face because of them but I am supporting a good tan. As I think about this tan, I remember back when my mom was sick and its had been a long grueling few days and was coming back from being at home and all the way up the road, 2 hr drive, I was in the zone with worship music blasting, me singing my heart out, prayer time with God and just filling up my heart with the things of Him before I walked back in to be with mom. I remember walking into my moms bedroom and my Aunt Sharon and Uncle Buster was there, my grandma and my dad all around the bed talking with mom. She was laying there and I came across the foot side of the bed and said - Hi mom. She looked at me and said "Randy, look at you - you are glowing". I will never forget those words. EVER. Those words are only because of that special time with Christ on the way there. It was all about God filling up my life during that time with the things of Him that it showed outwardly. See walking for Christ is not about doing good things, being at church every Sunday, saying all the right things, spending time only with other Christian friends - What if people noticed you being "radiant" because of the time you are spending with God? More time in the sun you spend the more tan you get. The more time you spend with God - the more Radiant you become and people notice! They notice by your actions, attitude and through the heart that God transforms.
Lots of times you can tell how the relationship is with Christ in someone by their actions, decisions and attitude. Your reflect where your heart is and when it is not in tune with Christ - it shows just like when you heart is right with Christ- it radiates that heart full of Jesus.
My study brings me to James 1:2-8 this morning.
2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 6But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; 8he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.
The last few days have brought me to a stronger place with a few loved ones as well as my relationship with Christ. Trials give us a chance to grow, stretch and trust. MORE.
I believe and will not doubt again because of the love you have shown me, the hearts that where hurt, the trust that was questioned - have calmed the storms. The sun may not be shining this morning but it sure is bright because of you. Our relationship "Radiates". :)
Im NOT looking back ...... <3

Lonnie~