I wanted to share this morning something that took place yesterday and I am still thinking about it. Time today can not go fast enough until I get back to the nursing home. Yes I know that sounds crazy but let me share this story.
Yesterday while visiting my son and some of "My Kids" at school for lunch, I was asked to visit someone who is at the same nursing home as my father-n-law ... so I accepted and told them I would stop in. Not really sure what to expect or what I was going into but with a growing heart for these folks there, it sure was an amazing experience.

This woman is the mother n law of one of the teachers at my sons school. She is probably in her late 70's I would say and as of last night, she was close to leaving this world for heaven. Her kidneys shutting down and some other bodily issues taking place - morphine for pain being administered - what seemed like a gloom and doom thing surely was not. I asked the nurse on staff about where this woman was and told her the situation. She gladly told me she would get me through the locked doors and take me to her room. Upon entering I could tell I was in a very different part of the nursing home - a part of which I did not even know was there or was even prepared for in any way. I was taken to her room and got to meet her and the womans daughter. I told her who I was and how I came to know about her mom. Immediatly I was comforted and knew I was doing a great thing but more importantly a needed thing. I knelt down and spoke with the daughter and asked about her moms life. Where she was from and what her life was like. We spoke probably for 20 minutes even though it went by so fast. It was clear that this daughter loved her family and loved her mom. It was clear that it was ok for mom to leave and that she would be going to a better place - a place to be with family, friends who have passed away over the years but more importantly to a place where her husband would be. As I knelt with this daughter it became clear to me that my mom made this possible. She made it possible for me to sit there in this situation and be ok with it all. To talk from my heart and really know what this daughter was feeling and going through because of what I experienced with my mom 2 years ago - it was such a blessing and last night I took such comfort in that - comfort in taking the time to stop and be with that awesome family. I shared some details with the daughter about my mom and gave her some closing advice about the decisions ahead of her with her mom. I told her to ask God to lead her in keeping her mom comfortable - that God will take her when either He was ready or when her mom was ready to let go and to trust in those decisions that they were the right ones - no regrets. I told her I would stop back tomorrow night (tonight) if her mom was still here. She thanked me and gave me a quick hug before I left. There were some small tears during this conversation but more than that - there were smiles.
I do want to share that I really wanted to pray with her and her mom - even though I did last night and again this morning for them. BUT I wanted to pray then - I did not know what to say or even where to begin - maybe it was a little fear I guess in the situation but I am thankful for the situation that God placed before more. If asked to do that again in the future - I would without hesitation! It's comforting knowing that folks are going to a better place for all eternity. I am sad for those who have chosen a different path in life without God. Eternity is a sad step for those not entering Heaven - especially for those family members left behind. I just pray Walt will open his heart in time to hear what God has in store for him. Carol's mom is there waiting on him and it would be sad for her to go through her life and then pass away - waiting on Walt to once again join her but to never see him again and to know his eternity is in Hell. All of us have someone who is heavy on our hearts if we walk with Christ who is chosing a path to Hell for their eternity. Pray today for that person or loved one - for acceptance and a softening of their heart.
One of the greatest blessings in walking with Christ is accepting whatever it is He places before us - What ever it is Lord, use me for your glory and honor. Yesterday, a scary place that today is a little less scary. Courage, trust in the Lord and a faith that is growing closer to Jesus with each passing day.
So many of the folks at the nursing home are close to their eternity - 30 days to live is a series I am leading my Rock Group family - It just could not be more perfect timing to experience what God is placing on my life today.

My quiet time from this morning~
1 Corinthians 1
Christ the Wisdom and Power of God 18For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19For it is written: "I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."[c]

Are you ready? You too could be in your 30 days to live window.....
Lonnie

One last Father's comment~

During one of my morning quiet times with the Lord while eating breakfast a few months back my son came out of his room after getting ready for school and walked up to the kitchen table and asked me what was wrong. I was sitting quietly with my head down and was praying. Maybe he thought I fell asleep or maybe I was having a moment that had brought me to tears - I am not sure but I told him that I was praying and lifting him along with his momma and our day ahead to God. See that was an important moment because praying in front of our children should not be limited to only when we eat. They need to see us trusting and placing our lives and struggles at the feet of Jesus. They need to know they are being prayed for and they need to see us humbly before God.
Fathers - Pray with your kids! The prayers of a father are powerful and effective. Children learn to humbly approach the throne of grace by watching how their fathers pray. Let them see God answer our prayers!

As we finished our Rock Group lesson last week, we all gathered around for closing prayer and our littlest one who is 2 1/2 came walking over as we were in a circle holding hands and he found his place in the circle - gathered the hands of the folks next to him and watched - looking up at everyone and seeing what was taking place. It is such an amazing moment but a moment that will shape this little child into an adult who will remember growing up with loved ones all around him. He will remember them in prayers and over time he will see God answer the many prayers being lifted from our Rock Group. That is exciting!

Fathers - God wants to be a part of your family and He has so much to say about families, things to teach and show you. Give Him a part of it, open His word and let His ways sink into those hard to reach places in your family. If you don't raise your children under the guidance of God, guess who will raise them .... society will and imagine where that road will lead them. It's time to take a stand for your family - its time to lead them.

I have enjoyed learning and writing about being a father - I hope these last blog posts have been beneficial for you as they have for me.
I love being a dad and all it means. Pray over your children - Psalm 91, Psalm 1, Isaiah 54 - that will get you started~
Lonnie

An awesome Design....

God has created each of us with a very unique design. Even exact twins will be different from each other as their is no one like you. God has also created our children with a very unique design and He has uniquely pre-wired each child for His purposes with specific gifts, talents and passions.
Ephesians 2:20
19-22That's plain enough, isn't it? You're no longer wandering exiles. This kingdom of faith is now your home country. You're no longer strangers or outsiders. You belong here, with as much right to the name Christian as anyone. God is building a home. He's using us all—irrespective of how we got here—in what he is building. He used the apostles and prophets for the foundation. Now he's using you, fitting you in brick by brick, stone by stone, with Christ Jesus as the cornerstone that holds all the parts together. We see it taking shape day after day—a holy temple built by God, all of us built into it, a temple in which God is quite at home.

Parents need to discover heavens blueprint within each of their children and cultivate it. This spring, Carol and I are letting Kyle decide if he wants to play baseball or not. Either way is ok with me because he has to have passion in what he does and not just to do something to make someone else happy. I am happy with him regardless if he plays or not - maybe Soccer is his deeper passion as far as sports. I will accept his decision either way. I also accept that Kyle understands science - he struggles some with math - God has made him special and with his own style - his own likes and dislikes. We are the same way - many of us struggle in certain areas and situations and excel in others. So many of us also work so hard had trying to improve what we not so good at or bad at and drive ourselves nuts to be better at - when we should be working on the things we are already good at and make them better! Imagine how much further you would go improving on the very thing we are already good at!
We need to teach our children to seek the Lord and to commit their abilities to Him. Not everyone can run a company - not everyone can be CEO - not everyone can be a teacher or a nurse .... but God has created us all to do something that is what we are designed to do.

Continue to pray for God to reveal your gifts, passions and talents..... you may be surprised at what He shows you - what He shows you about your children........

Lonnie

Matthew 3:17
17And a voice from heaven said, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased."

Proverbs 17:6
6 Grandchildren are the crowning glory of the aged; parents[a] are the pride of their children.

One of the greatest blessings in being a father is that I get to bless my children. Carol and I have only Kyle as our ~blood~ child but I am blessed to have an influence of many children in my life. In many ways, Kyle does have many brothers and sisters. I love that God has blessed me with each of them and I do feel deep down that they are"My Kids". Fathers need to bless their children. Children develop their identity and sence of security from their fathers. When Kyle is sick or any child is sick - who do they want? Their mothers..... I understand the important role there - just last week, Kyle was not feeling well. Carol made the decision to keep him home from school and they had some mommy son time together. He was not all that sick that he could not of went to school but she felt that he needed some "just mommy" time with her.
When our children are grown enough and head out into the world for themselves, so many are in need of their fathers blessing. They need to know that they have dad to back them up - to have dad praying for them as they enter the big world amongst the sharks, they need that confidence and its our role dads, to give them those blessings.
I am already praying for Kyle friends, his first real girlfriend and his wife one day. I am already praying over his life that God will use him and that he finds his God given gifts in life and lives in Gods blessing zone. I am praying that for all "My Kids" and for them to one day really know that I am praying for them and that I have committed my life to them.
Father's, we need to learn how to bless our children, to not expect perfection from them but to encourage them and praise them for trying. Doing their best is all that God expects from them and from us, so why expect perfection from them? Let them see you praying, holding hands with others while praying and loving them the way God has instructed us to do so.
If a generational curse has been passed down as in divorce, abuse or some other thing - You be the stop to that curse and begin to pass down godly blessings to them.

Our children need to see us "Preparing for the Rain!" of Gods blessings and moving forward in our faith. They need to understand by our faith and in our actions that God deserves to be worshiped and praised for who He is and not for what He does.

Lead on fathers~ It takes courage and guts - and God has given us men those gifts....
Lonnie

Discipline ~ A tough thing

Yes Discipline is a tough topic when dealing with our children. So many factors come into play when we discipline our children. But God has given us some things to go by.

Ephesians 6:4
4Fathers, don't exasperate your children by coming down hard on them. Take them by the hand and lead them in the way of the Master.

- Fathers are commanded to train up their children with godly nurture and discipline. A few months ago I lead a Rock Group series on ParentHood. It was a great lesson and as I studied and learned about what God had to say about ParentHood - Discipline was a tough subject. One of the things I took away from that series was - discipline NOT in anger. I have found myself on a few occasions coming down on my son when I was mad, caught up in the moment, maybe taking my voice up too loud, my punishment too hard and then feeling bad afterwards.
I can remember my dads method of discipline - sometimes it was right in the moment and sometimes it was when he got home after my momma would say - "just wait till your dad gets home!" I can remember those infamous words "This is going to hurt me, more than it hurts you" - I always thought my dad was nuts for saying something like that but I now understand. It is hard to discipline our children. One thing that I make sure I do now is to make sure I am not angry - I tell myself to have a cool off period and think things through before the judgement comes down. I have always told Kyle that lessons are learned and sometimes cannot be taught. Carol and I are very lucky to have a great son and we have not had to discipline him all that much. But we also have to remind him where the line is and what is acceptable and what is not.

We have to let our children get caught sometimes and suffer the punishment with mom and dad not being their to rescue them. Lessons learned now when they are young make for smaller mistakes when they are grown.

Always remember to love your child even during discipline - to let them know that they messed up but its ok - mistakes are a part of life. Forgive them and say not another word. Too many parents continue to bring the subject up, continue to remind them over and over again only to bring resentment and hard feelings between everyone. We want to pull our children in just like our Heavenly Father does instead of pushing them away.

Discipline in love~

Lonnie

Being a dad/mentor on a Friday...

BY far there are more parents who go and have lunch with their kids on Fridays at school. During the week many parents are working or have other routines that keep them from having lunch but many times kids don't get visitors at all. I learned that about 2 of "My Kids" in the past few months - they are both in 5Th grade and both of them had never had a visitor have lunch with them. They are both on my weekly schedule to have lunch with - there are obstacles to cross over, teachers to build trust with and school rules to wiggle around but I continue to go and face the challenges because it is that important.
Today's lunch was great - Had lunch with 3 of "My Kids" today and on a day that I usually don't go to this particular school so it was a nice surprise when the kids come in and see me waiting on them when I am not usually there - but the awesome thing is - they are now looking for me each day at lunch time. That just touches my heart and makes me feel good that I am making that little difference in their lives. Today I had a chance to sit and pray a little extra for those 3 kids before going in because I was a few minutes early - its something I do every time before going into the school - to pray for God to have something for me to tell them, to have something for me to show them and for God to bless them and their families. I place all these relationships in God's hands because I know - It wont be like this for long. I accept that even though I really will miss this when they move on to middle school or don't want to have lunch with me anymore. But one of the things that really makes me smile is when I see the Lord come through these children. Even at school - where they ask me about the cross on my neck, they pray before they eat and we talk about Sunday school or our Rock Group. I always tell "My Kids" to make sure they tell their mom or dad that I was there and we had lunch together. Other parents have called or teachers call their parents to make sure it is ok - I am glad parents are looking out for each other and teachers are making sure its ok - but what an honor for one of "My Kids" to tell that parent or teacher that its ok for me to have lunch with their child. It is an awesome feeling and a trust there because I am investing in them and they know God is put first in those relationships.
In many ways I am being a mentor and I kind of look at that way because I am building more in these kids than just a friend and being one of dad's cool buddies. There is more to it than that.

Being a dad it is our responsibility to pour God's word and life lessons into our children.

Deutoronomy 6:7
7 Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.

I don't want "My Kids" - Kyle included to remember me so much as a dad but as a coach. I want to coach "My Kids" in life - I want them to experience it and guide them but not keep them from it and protect them so much. Yes they will make mistakes - we as parents have made mistakes and continue to do so but I also want to live my life being an example of where God is in my life. That life goes to God before everything else and everything else will fall into place. I want "My Kids" to see me pray, to hear me pray, to hear me talk about God on the phone and the conversations I have. God is our heavenly father and is very much our coach in life, cheering us on and keeping us encouraged, proud of us when we do good and He pulls us close when we don't or when we are hurting.
Don't put off another minute without telling your kids, no matter how old they are, that you love them and accept them. Children need to hear that from their parents. That they have parents who are proud of them. Don't ever assume they know it.... that we know it - we are children to someone! God passes the blessing along to His children - You can do the same to yours children. God is leading by example......

Love you all,
Lonnie

Finishing Touches~

I am just finishing up my lesson for this coming Sunday for my Rock Group. I am leading a 4 part series "30 Days to Live" and we are on lesson 2. I was going to save this for the third week but I wanted to share this with you tonight because for those who read this, it will give you a heads up and a chance to really think about the sentences. Print them out if you want - and email them to me.... lrbatema@gmail.com

This is from a book I am reading now - Chazown - which is Hebrew for Vision. Gods vision for your life - how many of us really have it and know what God's vision is and are we really living it? I think of many folks who are in their sweet spot and in the most amazing place because they are where God wants them and man - are they hitting on all cylinders! Look at Kenny Chesney - his music is awesome. Look at Billy Graham, Perry Noble and Craig Groeschel - look at Payton Manning, Sam Mills and Reggie White! So many to list.... so many living in their sweet spot doing amazing things!
The book starts at the end - most people end their lives in bed. Looking over their life - regrets and bad decisions haunt them - they have time to think and its all in the past - there is nothing we can do to change any of it. Psalm 118 - Today is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it. I just love that because I read that to my mom everyday I was with her after she got sick and left to be with the Lord.

This is my Epitaph~

*The thing that was most important to me.... is my family, my church family and "My Kids" - being a good fatherly example and having FUN always with a smile :)

*People say I stood for ... something bigger than myself. I pray folks say that I took a stand for God and went the distance to love on others. To always be there for others and to always have an open heart to listen and walk with them no matter what or how or when.

*I made a difference in my world by ... by making lasting investments. Does this matter 100 years from now? Investing in others does ...

*God was glorified because I ... accepted Him during the time that my mom passed and He has walked with me since. Walking with God brings Him glory and a smile.

*People knew I loved them because.... I told them! I pray for those opportunities to share the love I have for them.

*The reason why I expect God to say "Well Done" is because ..... I have God close in my heart, I love Him and I did everything I know how to be for Jesus.

Email me your completed thoughts... would love to hear from you.

Lonnie